Hop a Plane
by Haley's Comet
Summary: ONE-SHOT: Ever wonder what Craig and Ellie were thinking about when they were at the airport? Here's my take on it. Obviously, Crellie.


**Disclaimer:**** I do not own Degrassi, or any of its characters. The only thing I own is my own ideas and creativity put into this story. I am merely a fan of the show, and to Crellie. I'm not writing this fic for any profit what-so-ever. **

**This is one of my only song-fics, but I write for Degrassi a lot. This one-shot goes more into detail for what Craig and Ellie were feeling at the airport when they said goodbye. It switches back and forth for whose point of view it is, but I put -C- for Craig, and -E- for Ellie so readers don't get confused. The song is **_**Hop a Plane**_** by Tegan and Sara.**

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**Hop A Plane- Chapter One:**

_**-E-**_

_What in the hell am I doing_, is all I could ask myself for the past three days. I spent so much time and hopeless effort getting Craig out of my mind, and I just through it all away. I built this new life for myself; I was a new Ellie. When I traded in my drumsticks for a fancy new set of college textbooks, I thought that would be enough. When Craig left to go be a rock star, I tried to move on. He was the one person in my life who I could never trust in a million years—but it didn't matter. Sometimes after group therapy he would tell me I was the only one who really understood him. I've never been someone's first choice, so even being picked over everyone else in Craig's life, just as a friend, was good enough for me. I liked to believe that he needed me, but felt nothing but disappointment when the truth came bubbling up from the surface. I was…convenient. He didn't need me.

_**I took the train back**_

_**back to where I came from**_

_**I took it all alone it's been so long I know**_

_**imagine me there my heart asleep with no air**_

_**begging "ocean please, help me drown these memories**_

So now I stand here, hopeless and pathetic waiting for him to turn my way. I ask myself once again, _what in the _hell_ am I doing?_ I finally got this guy out of my head and the minute he got a bit homesick and popped by for a visit, I turn to mush at his feet. I lost all respect in myself. I morphed into the same poor, pathetic, lovesick puppy I was two years ago. How sad.

I can't believe he's had such a toll over me for these last few days. When Craig showed up in Toronto, I wanted him so badly to see me. I needed for him to see I wasn't the same girl he'd left behind. It was like I made myself into a new person, and I so badly wanted him to think I was finally good enough for him, but now I realize I never will be.

As he turned his head towards me from the feel of my presence, my heart sank. The look of surprise shocked me, making me believe that it truly was a mistake coming here, and that I didn't belong. I was trying to portray the part of another girl's life—a girl that Craig actually wanted, like Manny or Ashley. Not me. _Never_ me.

This angered me a little, but I set the feelings aside as I bit my lip and outstretched my arm, plane ticket at hand. I had to do this for him. He had a problem and used me to get what he wanted, and yet here I stood… All ready to guide him to fixing up his own life. I had one drunk in my being, which wasn't fun, and I didn't need a druggie to. That is why I'm making him go to rehab. Well—talking _Joey_ into making him go to rehab. It's what he needs and he knows it.

"You're on the 11AM to Calgary." I said sadly, once I gained the courage. All he did was stare at me skeptically, making me feel slightly self conscious and adding to my fear of being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

_**I'm moving east there's somewhere far away from**_

_**the sight of my hands the sight of me not moving**_

_**you can't just hop a plane and come and visit me again**_

_**I claim it's in my head and I regret offering**_

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_**-C-**_

What was she doing here? I've already done my damage hurt her enough. Every time I mess up, she's there—ready and willing to put the pieces back together. I don't know why she has all this unearned faith in me. I can't understand how she could just keep coming back to get let down by me more and more. I can never be good enough for her and I will never deserve her, so why does she keep trying to help?

When I kissed her before—it felt like a big weight was lifted of my shoulders and was replaced by a nervous twisted feeling in my gut. I thought everything would be better, that I could finally tell her how I feel. Of course I had to ruin it all. Any man that can make her smile so vibrantly, and then snatch it all away leaving her nothing but the dark grimace of pure disappointment should be put to death. I can't believe I was the source of that pain. I just can't understand how I could do that to her.

I sighed deeply as I moved my hand towards hers, taking the ticket from her grasp. She looked at me with such sad eyes and the feeling returned to me. Why was I worth all of this?

"Joey's waiting for you at the airport." I was surprised by how confidant she sounded. It didn't match up with her expression. I studied the ticket, mindlessly moving a finger across the text as I realized that she was probably just here to make sure I got on the plane. She's always been like that. As much as I hurt her she will always bounce back if she's doing what she believes is right. She can be so selfless, unlike me. I used to believe Ellie and I were so similar, but now I realize we may have related interests sure, but I will never be like her. Nobody could ever be quite like Ellie.

I took another deep breath and faced her, getting her eyes to match up with mine. "I guess you're here to make sure I get on the plane—right?"

She raised her eyebrows at me, making me feel really stupid for asking her. She then shook her head and looked behind her as she spoke. "No—Um, Mr. Simpson is."

I moved my attention to Mr. Simpson and I couldn't believe I hadn't noticed him there before. He looked as if he were trying to blend in and make it less obvious that he was spying on me.

I then looked down at my feet as Ellie continued to speak. "I'm leaving", she said softly, causing my heart to break. I guess I _had_ hurt her to much to care about what happens to me. Joey probably just gave her the ticket to give to me. She didn't need me, but I needed her more then anything and didn't want to let her go. I knew I had to, however.

_**all I need to hear is that you're not mine you're not mine**_

_**all I want to hear is that you're not mine you're not mine**_

Her walk was slow and steady, as she began to turn a corner and part from me. I don't know what it was exactly, but I found myself springing to my feet and trying to reach her. Despite what I or anybody else might think at times, I'm not as strong as Ellie. She might be ready to leave me, but I not ready for her to walk away yet. I need her more then I ever thought possible. She's always been there for me and I have no idea why I've never seen that before today.

"Ellie. I know I messed up—" I grabbed her arm and when I got her to face me, it killed me to see that she was crying. She was trying to cover her face with a free hand, but it still didn't help me any. God I'm such an idiot. I continued to speak, my voice wavering slightly and loosing its confidence. "Badly. But I am Glad for one thing. I was finally able to be honest with you."

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_**-E-**_

I stared into Craig's hopeful eyes and shook my head. Everything I was hearing was just Craig being Craig. He thinks because he hurt me he can make it all up by pretending to feel things that we both know aren't true. He was a lot of things to me, but honest was definitely not one of them. I've always believed that when he acts like such a jerk—he doesn't intend to, but when he tries to fix things he just makes matters worse.

"I meant what I said." He told me, a smile beginning to crackle through his lips. It was so hard to keep reassuring myself that nothing that he was saying was true. He stroked my cheek and continued. "And I've felt that way for a long—"

I sighed, remembering when he told me he loved me, and cut him off. I removed his hand from the side of my face, causing him to frown. It found it was very difficult to choke out the words. "No—no just, don't—don't, just—it's beside the point. You need _help_."

His face reacted, causing me to feel badly as he took my words to heart. I'm not the first person in the world to tell him that he needs help, and he finally thought he was passed it. He shook his head once again as he replied, his voice calm. "I know, I know. I going to rehab or whatever, but when I get out maybe we could—"

I shook my head and dismissed whatever he would say next. "No—goodbye, Craig." I know that all of it was lies. I turned away from him, leaving him stunned, and thought back to everything that he told me. I _know_ he didn't mean any of it.

_**you take a second take a second take a year take a year**_

_**you took me out and took me in and told me all of this**_

_**and then you take a moment take a moment take a year take a year**_

_**you help me out I listen in you taught me all of this and then**_

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_**-C-**_

My heart fell to the pit of my stomach as I watched her walk away, leaving me standing here and staring back at her. I couldn't blame her for leaving me like this, but at least now I had something to work for. She broke my heart, but that didn't mean I wouldn't try to get her back. I just needed to become a better man first.

I know she didn't believe anything I said, but I've always said, _'I only say I love you at airports'_, so that was the proof of my sincerity.

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**That was all! How did you like it? Tell me in a review! I've been planning a few new Crellie stories, so if you liked this little one-shot then let me know so I'll post more. ** **Also, if you believe there is something you think I should change, tell me that too. Criticism helps me more then you could ever know, and I welcome every bit of it. Thank you so much for reading, and be sure to either check out more stories that I've written already, or check back to see if I made any new ones in a little while.**


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